Posts Tagged ‘Malfoy’

Harry Potter and The Woman in Black

Wednesday, February 1st, 2012

J.K. Rowling told us all that the Harry Potter movies would keep getting darker, but nobody could have expected that they would eventually devolve into little more than B-grade horror flicks. Also, apparently, she didn’t even write a novel for this latest one, and had nothing to do with the production of the film. In fact, if Daniel Radcliffe wasn’t in it, you might not even know that Harry Potter and The Woman in Black was a Harry Potter movie at all. He doesn’t dress like Harry Potter, he doesn’t have a magic wand, he flies on a flying carpet instead of a broom, and he apparently had cosmetic surgery to remove the lightning bolt birth mark from his forehead.  The only thing he kept so that his fans will recognize him is his Harry Potter accent.

As much as this film strays from its source material, it isn’t without its charm. In fact, some of the changes are very bold and exciting. I won’t bore you with plot details, as the plot is extremely boring, but I will ruin the entire movie for you by revealing the surprise twist ending: The Woman in Black turns out to be Voldemort seeking revenge on all mankind for the botched sex change operation s/he received.  That s/he should blame “all mankind” for the malpractice of one plastic surgeon certainly isn’t fair, but then again, we already knew s/he was kind of crazy and not very nice. The real twist ending is that the doctor who removed Harry’s lightening bolt birthmark is the mentor of the intern who prepped Voldemort for her/his sex change. Naturally, this causes Harry and Voldemort to fall in love. Prepare yourselves, as their big kiss is even more awkward than when Voldemort hugs Malfoy at the end of Deathly Hallows Part 2.