I am not exactly sure why I did this, but I think it sums me up as a person. It is not all that polished of a digital painting, but it is as tight as I’m ever going to get. The subject matter is typical American life in the 2010′s from the prospective of innocence. I don’t really know what that last sentence means. Anyway, there are details in this painting that I’m hoping people find and appreciate. Here’s a partial list:

• The child seems indifferent to what he’s doing, even though he’s clearly doing it on purpose- Why is he staring off into space? Doesn’t he like ice cream? Why does he look somewhat sad?
• The Goat-man seems repulsed by the family- Even before he ended up with ice cream on his lap, you get the sense he had pushed himself as far towards the end of the bench as possible in order to create space between himself and the child. He probably wishes he had chosen to stand.
• The Goat-man is naked except for the bright red sneakers- Also, the laces seem to disappear. Maybe they’re tucked into the sneakers. All I know is that I didn’t feel like drawing the knot.
• The child is not wearing shoes- This is because, after doing 2 pairs, I got tired of drawing shoes. And only one of them has laces. Laces are a pain in the ass to draw, and not very satisfying.
• Neither the child nor the mother are concerned that a scary-looking beast is sharing a park bench with them- Also, the nudity doesn’t seem to be a problem for them.

Let me know if you see any other details you like. I believe this is my most important work so far.  I’m hoping this painting can change the world at least a little bit.

If you’re from Latham, the Albany area, the tri-state region, or if you just happen to really love water towers or checker patterns or shirts that say “never forget” and have some not-that-serious thing you’re supposed to remember, then you should go to Donkeyshines Jr. and check out the design. It comes on many styles of shirt, including children’s size.

Some of you may be wondering why I didn’t draw the giant gorilla’s junk. Initially, I just didn’t think about it. I’ve drawn many, many apes, looking at many, many sources for reference and never have I actually taken notice of what a gorilla’s junk looks like. Somehow the junk must have always been obscured by the ape’s position or whatever, and I apparently didn’t need that information for whatever ape pose I was drawing. In THIS drawing, however, the lack of gorilla junk is pretty noticeable. I even had a chance to cover that area with clouds, but for whatever reason, I just didn’t realize until after I was finished. I suppose I could still go back into it and either add gorilla junk or move that one cloud slightly lower, but I’m just too lazy. Also, as always, I need to stop myself now, or I could keep working on the same drawing forever. Perhaps the next time I draw a gorilla (which will definitely be some time this year) I will add the junk. We’ll just have to wait and see. Perhaps the next gorilla I draw will be wearing pants.

J.K. Rowling told us all that the Harry Potter movies would keep getting darker, but nobody could have expected that they would eventually devolve into little more than B-grade horror flicks. Also, apparently, she didn’t even write a novel for this latest one, and had nothing to do with the production of the film. In fact, if Daniel Radcliffe wasn’t in it, you might not even know that Harry Potter and The Woman in Black was a Harry Potter movie at all. He doesn’t dress like Harry Potter, he doesn’t have a magic wand, he flies on a flying carpet instead of a broom, and he apparently had cosmetic surgery to remove the lightning bolt birth mark from his forehead.  The only thing he kept so that his fans will recognize him is his Harry Potter accent.

As much as this film strays from its source material, it isn’t without its charm. In fact, some of the changes are very bold and exciting. I won’t bore you with plot details, as the plot is extremely boring, but I will ruin the entire movie for you by revealing the surprise twist ending: The Woman in Black turns out to be Voldemort seeking revenge on all mankind for the botched sex change operation s/he received.  That s/he should blame “all mankind” for the malpractice of one plastic surgeon certainly isn’t fair, but then again, we already knew s/he was kind of crazy and not very nice. The real twist ending is that the doctor who removed Harry’s lightening bolt birthmark is the mentor of the intern who prepped Voldemort for her/his sex change. Naturally, this causes Harry and Voldemort to fall in love. Prepare yourselves, as their big kiss is even more awkward than when Voldemort hugs Malfoy at the end of Deathly Hallows Part 2.